A few words...
 Anyone who met me would never guess this is my world. I could be anyone, the woman in line in front of you, a co-worker, a public servant, your child's teacher. Be kind and remember you never know what people are going through, no matter their public persona.

My Little Brother

I am so heartbroken. My family has been plagued by addiction for several years. No one who new us in my childhood would have ever guessed life would be this way for us now. I have two little brothers; one an open and recovering addict, the other took his own life a few days ago. He seemed to be the more stable of the two, yet had begun to suffer from anxiety and depression in the last year or so. This led to a breakdown of his marriage and his role as a father. I first became alarmed about his well-being and stability about a year ago when my mother told me he relayed to her he stayed out all night the night before after having used cocaine. Being roughly 5,000 miles away all I did was relay my shock at this to my husband and hope he did not do it again. He began psychiatric treatment and cycled through many types of medications eventually adding alcohol to the mix. I last spoke to him about 5 weeks ago in which he relayed to me his sadness and depression. I cried with him and tried to offer words of hope. I later posted to his Facebook wall words of encouragement. Why did I not reach out to him again? I will regret it forever. This story will probably be posted in bits and pieces here as I feel strong enough to write about it. My grief is a river in which I feel I am drowning.